Let’s talk…

I always said that I would stay true to myself when it came to my blog. I said that I’d only share things that I truly enjoy, things that I feel passionate about; to have a space to explore my interests, talents and hobbies. I also told myself to remain neutral on hot topics that I didn’t feel 100% strongly about. 

With that being said, I feel like this is the perfect space to talk about what’s on my heart and my mind lately. You all may be sick of seeing/hearing/experiencing everything involving the inauguration, our new President, women’s marches, etc…Lord knows that I am. 

That doesn’t mean that I don’t care. It doesn’t mean that I’m happy with the current state of my community, country and world. It doesn’t mean that I’m lazy, sheepish or self absorbed. 

Do you know what it means? It means that I have enough crap to worry about day to day that I just simply cannot worry about how EVERY SINGLE other person on this earth feels on a daily basis. I can’t waste time and effort and energy on “fighting the power”, standing up for everyone under the sun, marching, protesting and “teaching”. I’m sure that I hit a nerve with some of you and you know what, THAT’S OKAY! It’s okay to have differing opinions. It’s okay to agree to disagree. It’s okay to have healthy arguments.

You know what’s not okay. It’s not okay to be looked down on by the same women who are out there wearing their “Nasty” shirts, promoting feminist ideas and concentrating on women’s rights. The women who want me to join their force are the same women who criticized me when I struggled with breastfeeding and “gave up” after 4 months. The same women who say things like, “Oh so you just stay at home with your child all day?”. The same women who constantly bitch about how they’ve gained weight, their clothes are frumpy and they have “mom hair” but are the first ones to preach body positivity (like literally preach it). A friend of mine posted this and I completely agree (thanks Amanda!):

I have been more harshly judged by females in my life than I ever have a man. I have been more highly criticized and hurt by my relationships with females. I have seen women looked down upon by other women for everything from their shoes to the way they feed their newborn baby. We as women gossip about each other and compete to somehow gain satisfaction in the failures of each other.

I’m just tired of the constant need to discuss these hot topics. Why can’t we just live each day with intent and hope? I’m tired of people hiding behind their phones and laptops but feeling that if they post 15 updates per day regarding their stance on XYZ, that they’re actually DOING something. You’re not. You’re feeding the fire that feeds the drama that then feeds a bigger commotion and divide. 

Maybe I’m just not the type to get caught up in things that I don’t deal with daily (and I admit that I’m probably wrong in doing so) but with that being said… I wake up and I get excited to see my husband and my daughter. I put effort into caring for my family, making sure that everyone is healthy and happy, well fed and well mannered. I find joy in walking my daughter to the park, I find comfort in knowing we are in a wonderful home in a lovely neighborhood. I love teaching Charlee and brainstorming new activities to inspire her mind, creativity and personality. I work hard in business and even without a college degree, I am able to help my husband with his successful companies. To be quite honest, I don’t have enough hours in the day to worry about other people’s sh*t. You only get one life, live it how YOU want. Go to bed at night happy with who YOU are. Enjoy time with friends. Take your neighbor dinner. Plant flowers at your church. Read stories to your children. Enjoy a conversation with your husband. Call your parents simply to tell them that you love them. Mail your grandparents a letter. 

You don’t have to constantly be offended. You don’t have to find something wrong with every situation. Let the small stuff roll of your shoulders and if you feel like something is worth fighting for, then by all means – DO IT. But don’t make me feel like a crappy human being because I’m not right there with you. There will NEVER be an even playing field – it’s unrealistic. Do I think that certain people deserve more than they may have now? Yes, I do. But what I don’t think is right is for me to feel like I’m not worthy of what I have simply because of the color I was born, my gender or my background. The same people who say that we shouldn’t be ashamed of who we are, are making me feel just that – ashamed.

If you’ve read this post so far, just please listen to my heart for a minute. If you’re a friend, family member or acquaintance, I appreciate you and I care about you. I don’t talk politics, religion, etc. often because our relationships aren’t based on those areas. I can have fun with you, enjoy spending time with you or love you, even if we don’t see eye to eye on everything and guess what? That’s okay. 

Thanks for letting me blab for a while and if I’ve offended you or angered you, I’m sorry you feel that way. I still love you! đŸ˜‰

xoxo, 
Ashleigh

 

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